Anxiety/OCD

This Little Piggy Went to Market

The little “piggy” I’m referring to was already in the market and was actually the biggest chunk of pork loin I think I have ever seen. So how did this seemingly normal occurrence send me into a panic attack? It’s a matter of where this piggy was located: the ice cream section.

Sweet Cravings

If you’ve been following me, you may know that I am a vegan (dairy-free, meat-free). When my husband and I stroll through the grocery store, we tend to stick to the ‘middle’ aisles; a.k.a the meat-free zones. So Sunday after church, we made a quick run to the store for some lunch and dinner items. Just when we were about to leave, I decided that I needed a carton of almond milk ice cream. I opened the freezer door, grabbed a pint, and tossed it into the basket. It was at the moment that I saw what can only be described as a scene straight out of a horror movie. That “piggy” was lying there on the ice cream shelf.

Out of Sight, Out of Mind

So why did this freak me out so much? Well for starters, we don’t buy meat. And I definitely hate to see it raw. In my OCD mind, raw meat equals germs like E. coli, Salmonella, or worse! Although it grosses me out, it normally isn’t a problem since we don’t actually buy it. Out of sight, out of mind. But let me tell you….something about seeing it where it doesn’t belong just stopped me in my tracks. What followed suit was about ten minutes of intense fear and a back-and-forth decision to either proceed as normal or drop everything and run!

Rational Thinking vs OCD

Of course, I understand that there was no logical reason to panic. After all, every shopping cart, basket, refrigerator door and register has been touched by someone who also purchased meat. That was my rational thinking. But if you know how OCD operates, you know that rational thinking gets tossed aside and the fear takes over. Those awful ‘what if’ thoughts kept running through my mind. What began as a normal trip to the grocery store had quickly evolved into a panic attack on aisle twelve.

Moment of Truth

So how did it all end? My husband talked me through it and helped me focus on the rational side of things. And my craving for ice cream may have had something to do with it as well! 😉 We said a prayer, bought our groceries, went home, and cooked the most delicious vegan tacos that I have ever tasted. It was another win against one of the toughest opponents I’ve ever faced: OCD.

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